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Thirteen precious orphans, plus one child who traveled
with us, on our November 2010 Lighthouse Project
trip to Moscow. Six of these children were adopted
by our families. But one of these souls was never
able to join his waiting family due to the 2012 tensions between the United States and Russia. Russia has not reopened to American adoption.
(Photo by David LaRocque)
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I expected to stay with it forever. The Russian Orphan
Lighthouse Project had been my life for six years, though I'd volunteered for
longer. It stoked a passion for Russia, brought me there 14 times, gifted me a son
and a daughter, and allowed me to find adoptive families for 80 older orphans.
Any list of the joys I found with Lighthouse would include some of my life's
most fulfilling moments.
Love of Russia could not blind me to its idiosyncracies,
though. Russia never stopped feeling untamed, like a roller coaster just barely
skimming its tracks. The country was touchy about everything adoption-related,
yet I never imagined our program would end as it did, crushing a million tender
dreams in the process.
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Dear Artem almost made it home to the
family who would have changed his future.
Every child left behind broke my heart, but
none like Artem. He was such a gentle,
innocent victim of a political situation he
would never even understand.
(Photo by David LaRocque)
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A cruel tit-for-tat closed Russia to American adoptive
families at the end of 2012. Aiming to punish the United States for the
Magnitsky Act―a piece of legislation wholly unrelated to adoption―the Russian
government devastated hundreds of orphans who had adoptive families working to
bring them home. Eighteen of those children―all older, two HIV-
positive, and
two sibling foursomes―were headed to Lighthouse families, moms- and
dads-in-waiting who had met and already adored them. It killed us to leave them
behind, especially since it seemed so unlikely that they'd be adopted by
Russians. In time, some of our kids did
find Russian families, so at least they'd be loved. But to the best of our
knowledge, few of our lost kids were so blessed.
We brainstormed ideas, then participated in nationwide
family-agency-U.S. State Department conference calls which happened frequently at
first, then slowed until hope died altogether. It would not have helped our
Russian kids, but eventually we began looking to other countries for work. I traveled
to Ukraine, and was on the verge of going to another country. Nothing
materialized. And though my heart never moved on, my life finally had to.
On my trips to Russia, I'd never actively looked for
children to adopt myself, though my eyes were incessantly open. During those
years, three kids endeared themselves to me so much that I would have adopted
any of them had I been able to arm twist my husband. But as much as his no's grieved me, I realized that the
Lighthouse Project was all-consuming, and that by not adopting one orphan, I
stayed able to serve many. Then it all dried up anyway, not by my will, but
seemingly by Vladimir Putin's.
In September 2013, when expectations for Russia were running
on fumes, my friend showed me a photo of a young Chinese girl. Even with
unwanted free time on my hands, I still wasn't looking to adopt, hoping Russia
might reopen. Further, the child was blind, which terrified me. So I did all I
could: just prayed that the Lord would call a family. In mercy He answered―by
calling mine. After a maddeningly tortured path, Eliana joined our family in
February 2015, through a process so circuitous that its ultimate success
scuttled any doubt that she was meant to be ours.
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Randy and I meeting Eliana for the first time
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Ironically, while battling for Eliana's adoption, I still
greatly feared bringing home a blind child. Several parents encouraged me,
claiming that their blind children were children first, and that blindness was
the least remarkable part of who they were. I hardly dared believe it, but
soldiered on out of duty. After her homecoming, though, I became the staunchest
of believers; Eliana swiftly and gracefully compelled me to view her as only my
daughter. Home nine months now, she has greatly exceeded my most optimistic
expectations; her joy, positivity, sweetness, intelligence, and 20/20 heart
vision define her so much more accurately than "blind" ever could.
Every day since she's been home I've felt thrilled by the gift she is. So much
that we are adopting again―another blind girl from China.
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Eliana loves to help, and is entirely capable.
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As Eliana flourished, my soul began aching for orphans with
special needs like hers. Seven weeks ago, the friend who'd showed me my little
one forwarded information about a trip to China quite similar to the Lighthouse
Project trips I'd run in Russia. With two intensely personal connections to
China through my daughters, I already loved the country, so my desire to travel
was kindled. My Eliana had opened my eyes to children with special needs, and
now I yearned to help them move from orphanages to families. At the beginning
of November, I arrived in Beijing to meet Perry, ten, a winsome boy who would
make advocacy for him easy once I got home. After our time together, I spent
the last days of my trip at a foster home for visually impaired children. Blind
children are among the most difficult to place; if only potential adoptive
families knew what I know now!
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A photo I took as I left my Russian kids' orphanage on
my first trip to Russia, back in 2005. It became the theme
It poignantly embodied the need I saw in Russia, and
motivated my work there until the country closed to
adoption. I drew immense inspiration from these faces,
and I pray some joy has come to their lives.
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Thus, my Lighthouse Project chapter of life is over. Like
closing a spell-binding book of endless surprises, I deeply regret its too-soon
ending. But I'll forever treasure the profound joy it brought me in those few
years; a billionaire with ten thousand lifetimes would be less blessed. The
Lighthouse Project―which was really only about the kids we helped―and those at
the end who we couldn't―has already begun shaping this new work in China.
As I say goodbye to Russia and its amazing story, I invite
you to come along to meet China's unloved, but lovable, orphans with special
needs. I plan to introduce them weekly on this blog, Too Special. I'd be honored if you subscribed and followed the blog at the right sidebar above.
There are more kids we can love and help together, and that
journey is just beginning.
